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Dealing with others around you falling pregnant when you are TTC

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When you're trying to conceive, it can be difficult to cope with others around you falling pregnant. Whilst you may feel happy for them, it can be a painful reminder that you are not.

We have outlined our advice for dealing with those around you falling pregnant when you are TTC below.

Allow yourself to feel 

When someone around you falls pregnant allow yourself to feel sad and don't feel guilty about it, you can feel sad for yourself and happy for your loved one at the same time.

This also applies to that time of the month when you get a negative test, allow yourself to feel disappointed.  

However, it is important to end on a positive note where you feel hope and optimism for the future. If you don’t then it could lead to a consistent downward spiral.  

Try not to compare  

When you are struggling to conceive or are coping with infertility, it's difficult not to compare and compete and it can feel like everyone around you is getting pregnant apart from you.

Whether that be celebrities, family or friends. It is important to remember that social media and pregnancy announcements are the highlight reel. Try to focus on yourself and your journey. 

Skip the baby shower 

Don’t feel bad about not attending baby showers if you feel like it would be more painful than enjoyable for you.

Your friend should most definitely understand as long as you communicate you're feelings to them. You can always be supportive of their pregnancy journey in other ways. 

Try to ignore hurtful comments 

When you get to a certain age it can feel like all people want to talk about is when you are having a baby or their own fertility or parenting experience.

Don’t be afraid to ask your friends if you can talk about other topics when you’re getting together, or just think of three or four things to bring up to get the conversation moving in another direction. 

Look to your community 

It is easy to feel completely alone during fertility struggles but it is important to know that you are not.

Having a strong support system can help you cope throughout your journey, whether that be your partner, family or friends. A small but strong support system who understand your boundaries and feelings is crucial.

In order to feel less alone in your experiences, you can look to people who have been through a similar experience.   

Further reading

  • The Fertility Community

    Article

    The Fertility Community

  • Eating for healthy sperm

    Article

    Eating for healthy sperm

  • Unexplained infertility

    Article

    Unexplained infertility

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